THE HAPLESS KNIGHT (Flash Short Story)
© Cupideros, Tuesday, October 28, 2008
(750 words)



He was a handsome nineteen or twenty year old, almost beautiful in his shiny-blonde-cropped hair, matted with sweat on his flawless forehead.  His eyes blue stared at me.  His round chin--dimpled.  His expression--smugness, surprise and guilt.  He looked asleep except for the tale-tale streaks of his own blood randomly scattered on once glittering silver armor, his left arm with its severed wrists, and the large ripped out portion of his larynx.  He won’t be wooing other girls.  I always dreamed for a knight, but I, obviously, forgot to discuss my wishes with my two protective mastiffs Rock (the jumper) and Roll (the biter).  Numerous books chaotically tossed around our huge library in our large estate in the Hamptons advertised more struggles.  The Pitiful Knight clutched Bluebeard in his right hand.  My parents take their annual Bahamas vacation early every spring. I’m rather use to being alone now. The refrigerator was full.  St. Good Girls Academy was on recess week.  We sent the help home on a paid week vacation.  You don’t need ten people cleaning up behind a thirteen-year-old girl. I play my remix Beauty and the Beast CD and read and read—so glad, finally, to avoid my necessary heavy science, history and math readings.

How did all this happened?  From the bloody carnage, thrown leather fairy tale books, black leather reading chairs: over turned Great-size chair, the side turned Middle-sized and my Teeny Tiny chair still, upright, where Rock lazily sat panting, I recreated what probably happened.  Once inside our Business-Hall-Of-Fame Hallway showing inventors, businesswomen and businessmen and significant artist, mostly of the writing genre, I might add, the Piteous Knight found his wooden lance more hindrance than asset.  Deep and short lengthen scraps exhibited over several broken framed photographs.  Half way through the battle, Roll snapped his lance in two.

Prince Faltering obviously went to his knife.  Several long scraps flowed along both walls.  The slick wooden floor, our housecleaning is superb, made the journey hazardous.
Rock gained several advantages to attack the Miserable Knight. Silver bits in the wood flooring showed, the Tragic Knight fell several times.  His helmet came off. The Library is the first room after the Hall of Fame.  I keep the library fireplace burning high when reading.  The Surprised Prince no doubt picked up my Snow White Perfume and Goldilocks Hair Shampoo scent. 

Unfortunately, while his steed trampled the azaleas and tulips surrounding our estate, before carving horseshoe clomps of evenly cut dark green grass, I had long since pulled the “fie lay art” sign askew that opened a secret passageway from the library to my fairytale bedroom.  Such passageways are lifelines for a thirteen-year-old girl addicted to staying up past her 11:00 p.m. curfew reading romance novels and fairy tale adventures.  Now in my bedroom with Sleeping Beauty Silk Covered mattress on fourteen feet high pink Princess Pea Pillows, I quickly fell asleep.  I hardly heard a wink.  For my habit is to stare at my star-covered ceiling showing a rare falling star.  I wish every night for a romantic knight to visit.

Tired of barking, Roll scratched my bedroom door and whimpered something awful-- he’s such a baby and a show off.  I awoke, climbed down, and don’t imagine that was easy in my Cinderella White Sleeping Gown.  I donned my sparkling Red Dorothy Oz Slippers and opened the door.  Roll immediately picked up the severed wrist attached to a chain mail fist holding a knife in its death grip.  Roll waged his tail excitedly and I was forced to acknowledge he had done well.  I petted him and said, “Good dog, Roll.  Now tell me where you bravely defended my honor.”

                                                                  ***
When I removed his entire armor, his cell phone tucked inside Hansel Khaki Shorts caught my attention.  I opened it, amazed.  I clicked on The Hapless Knight’s contact list.  I find my name, “Reading Princess.” Other names followed Soft Innocent Bride, Blue Blood Girl, Animated Princess Beauty, Princess from House of Royal, and Princess Red Rose.  I’m not sure what his noble intentions were now.  Rock and Roll may have done me a favor by removing the Prince of Misfortune after all.  Dogs are loyal to their owner.  I have to learn from my experiences, blah, blah, blah my parents say.  From this I learned waiting on the Prince was not only a bad idea, but a messy ideal to clean up as well.


                                                           —THE END—


























































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Mythology Self-Help Positive Thinking Jobs Computers Wicca Astronomy Arts
Literature Classical Music History Feminism Tao Te Ching Prosperity
Confidence Meditation Love Think and Grow Rich Suze Orman Mythology
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